Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Old man running free

I had a conversation last evening that has me pondering how my life will end up. Will I eventually mature enough to be like that guy on the Dos Equis commercial? ..  you know - The Most Interesting Man in the World.

"I don't play World of Warcraft often, but when I do - play a small female gnome named Butter Pants."

 Or will I end up a trollish little man with wrinkled skin who smells like pickled potatoes?

I've been giving this some thought and I bet I'll be the guy running buck-naked through the streets of Las Vegas, covered only in the hair that grows in places I never wanted it to. I'll be the Anti-Lady Godiva.

My sensitive private parts covered only by the wisps of my ear hair as I run along on my cankered, old bunion feet - screeching, "Show me to the buffet."

Which brings me to my second point - is it any more unsanitary to eat at a buffet naked? It shouldn't be really, but some how it is. I mean other than being accidentally smacked by something that wiggles or waggles. Believe me the older you get the more things loosen up down under.

But other than that .. I just would not be comfortable standing next to naked people buttering up crab legs. - just saying.

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Please keep everything PG or under or else I'll sick Elvis on you.