Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Netflix - So long and thanks for all the fish

If you're a member of Netflix, you probably received an email today similar to the one I did (shown below). I love how Netflix tries to make it sound like it's a good thing .. Hey your plan has split - like a stock and now you can choose - either get dvd's in the mail or you can stream them online. But wait there's more - if you don't do anything we'll charge your credit card for a new plan.

If Netflix were honest, here's how the email would read:

Dear Former Customer:

Shit runs down hill.

The old farts who run the movie studios (who have no understanding of technology and still think the internet runs in tubes) have decided that they want to grab ALL the money for themselves in DVD rentals. Although they have no inkling of how this works, nor do they have a distribution channel, these cheese-heads are squeezing us out by charging  exorbitant fees. You can expect similar things to happen to Itunes, Blockbuster, DirectTV, Hulu and Redbox. 

The reasonable price you used to pay has now been replaced with a horrible plan that either lets you get movies in the mail or watch a small selection on your computer - or you can choose to pay almost double for both.

We understand you're probably not reading this paragraph, because you're busy canceling your account. Netflix doesn't blame you; we would do the same thing.

However, because these companies don't have any consideration for customer loyalty or trust, you can be assured that they will screw up the deal. It won't be long before Sony and other content providers are back to infesting your computer, DVR, PlayStation, XBOX with rootkit viruses and have exposed you to every hacker east of Czechoslovakia. 

In the near future, your own equipment will spy on your every button press and snitching on any suspicious activity.  It wouldn't surprise us if they don't go after you with a den of lawyers and force your ISP to only allow access to 100 or so approved websites.

Therefore, our recommendation is to wait. It may take a year or so to completely ruin what's left of their tattered reputations but when that is through, we'll be back with lower price and better selections.

You are always welcome back.

Sincerely - Netflix.


The real truth .. the fact of the matter jack .. is that many people will go back to just downloading the movies illegally. I do NOT endorse this is any fashion. But it's reality - when rentals get too expensive and the commercials are way too long - and the added protection crap becomes unbearable, it will happen.

LA Times - Netflix raising prices

The authentic letter from Netflix

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