Went to the doctor and he asked me what was wrong. I opened my mouth and my tonsils jumped out and bit him on the neck. I think he may be infected .. not sure .. and so begins Day One of The Freaks of the Fiendish Face Gunk. Stay Tuned ..
Showing posts with label sick. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sick. Show all posts
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Safety First
I'm on my way to making a full recovery - I think. So, I am preparing all the necessary equipment to pick my daughter up from school. You can never be too careful with the dreaded Elementary School Gunk Face.
Time to suit up and move out!
Time to suit up and move out!
Elementary School Gunk Face
It's official; I have the dreaded Elementary School Gunk Face that has been going around my daughter's school. I will spare you the intricate details of the condition, other than saying it feels like I've been hit in the head several times by a rabid monkey wielding a plumber's wrench and a sack of wet flour.
I got another cup of tea and swigged down a couple more Advil. There's no point in going to the doctor and sitting in a room filled with even sicker people. What's the doctor going to do anyway? Now that I'm thinking about it, what do doctors actually do? Can't we just replace them with WebMD? - I kid.
Of course I did check my symptoms on WebMD - just in case it was some kind of exotic tropical disease. I did see the movie Contagion. It seems this particular bug is very common. Viruses are like bad apartment tenants. They come in to your head, invite all their friends for a huge party, thrash the place - knock holes in the wall, pee in the kitchen sink, stain the carpet and then leave in the middle of the night.
Well, I think it's off to bed for another hour or so. I will post another update if my condition changes, but I wouldn't worry - I think the mighty EiMB empire is secure for now.
I got another cup of tea and swigged down a couple more Advil. There's no point in going to the doctor and sitting in a room filled with even sicker people. What's the doctor going to do anyway? Now that I'm thinking about it, what do doctors actually do? Can't we just replace them with WebMD? - I kid.
Of course I did check my symptoms on WebMD - just in case it was some kind of exotic tropical disease. I did see the movie Contagion. It seems this particular bug is very common. Viruses are like bad apartment tenants. They come in to your head, invite all their friends for a huge party, thrash the place - knock holes in the wall, pee in the kitchen sink, stain the carpet and then leave in the middle of the night.
Well, I think it's off to bed for another hour or so. I will post another update if my condition changes, but I wouldn't worry - I think the mighty EiMB empire is secure for now.
I'm Pre-sick
I think I caught something from my daughter. I'm not sick; I'm pre-sick. You know that feeling you get right before you become sick.
Your head is kind of swimming and you feel sorta hot all over. It's not actually a bad feeling, kind of euphoric in a way - like being pre-drunk.
However, I've experienced this condition many times before, I know what's in store for me.
If I were on a road trip with my friends, this would be the time that I clapped them on the shoulder and told them goodnight. It wouldn't matter how much they begged or complained. Then I would head on over to the gift shop and purchase that fifteen dollar, one dose bottle of NyQuil. Head on up to my room - take a big swig, turn off the clock and go into a semi-coma for the next eighteen hours.
At my current age and physical condition I don't drink NyQuil or it's older cure-all, a shot of whiskey - so instead I've settled for a nice cup of tea and of couple of Advil.
I drew a nice picture of how I feel - this is me in my pajamas and my well-worn, comforting Star Wars t-shirt. I shall see you all after I am over Elementary School Gunk Face.
Your head is kind of swimming and you feel sorta hot all over. It's not actually a bad feeling, kind of euphoric in a way - like being pre-drunk.
However, I've experienced this condition many times before, I know what's in store for me.
If I were on a road trip with my friends, this would be the time that I clapped them on the shoulder and told them goodnight. It wouldn't matter how much they begged or complained. Then I would head on over to the gift shop and purchase that fifteen dollar, one dose bottle of NyQuil. Head on up to my room - take a big swig, turn off the clock and go into a semi-coma for the next eighteen hours.
At my current age and physical condition I don't drink NyQuil or it's older cure-all, a shot of whiskey - so instead I've settled for a nice cup of tea and of couple of Advil.
I drew a nice picture of how I feel - this is me in my pajamas and my well-worn, comforting Star Wars t-shirt. I shall see you all after I am over Elementary School Gunk Face.
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| Copyright 2011 Cram / Kmuzu |
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